Why are you on the internet?
This website is a personal website. It's for me. It's my personal space on the internet. I pay for it and I take care of it. I thought about doing useful stuff with it, but it's harder than you might think. I silently curse the facebook guys every day.

What will you put on it?
I'll damn well write what I please on it and you lot out there better start liking it.

How did you make it? Are you like a web developer or something?
Oh, it's build primarily using gpEasy - a free content management system that is damn good. use it if you have a website. It's as WYSIWIG as it gets. It only took half an hour to get this web site up and running!

What about all the stuff you had on here before? Can I still get xxx and yyy?
It's all gone. I was holding on to a load of old tat that nobody ever used. Now I can have all new tat.

I find *such and such* inappropriate and would llike you to remove it.
Reach into your pocket, find 20p, then use it to phone someone who cares. Maybe a lawyer.

Why are you such a knob?
Practice makes perfect.

Why do you complain so much?
Because I'm old and bitter.